friend: no assholes = good day
me: well, as unpleasant as emptying an ostomy bag can be, wiping an adult's anus is worse.
friend: I can't believe you've actually done that.
me: Dude. Get ready for a I've had the shittiest (literally!) day ever story. Settled in?
friend: uh oh
me: I have had this one patient for six days straight now. He is,hands down, the neediest, whiniest, and most - likely to be an abrupt asshole while you're holding his shit bag in your hand- adult I've ever met.
me: But everytime he screws his face up and whines, I feel like I have to physically hold my father back from getting down in his face and cussing him down the ground.
friend: Hahahah, damn!
me: Jesus! I know! (this is the last thing!)
AND he's extremely hard of hearing, and he yells everything he says. Everything! So when he demands his toothbrush, or for me to rearrange his bag in his bed, or accuses me of taking away his important documents when I changed the bed, it's all at top fucking volume.
SHUT IT UP, BITCH.
me:venting via chat can be therapeutic as well.
friend: You should have a journal devoted solely to venting about these things.
wait, that's an excellent idea!