ouch.

Why is Blogger offering to type in Hindi for me? Did I select something or is this some sort of blog worm? ah, never mind. I can't be bothered.

1. i have a headache. likely because it is in fact quarter til two and my ass is not yet in my ridiculously comfortable bed, with the window open to ridiculously cool air.
   
2. my tonsils hurt. like i've been smoking american spirits, which i HAVEN'T and so this sucks super bad. i've had right tonsillar megaly for about two years now, and at some recent visit, hopefully not my annual pelvic, it was deemed 'no big deal'. But it hurts. it feels like the nasal passages are inflammed? is that anatomically possible? I just want to figure out a way to squirt some warm water somewhere that will make it feel better! Gargle? Snort? Mouthful of it and breathe through my nose? flark!
3. i have my first clinical in peds on monday. I'm terrified. this won't surprise you. more details below.
   
4. i am contemplating asking the principal for a transfer to the cooler 2nd grade teacher from the asshole 2nd grade teacher. the risk in asking? that she might say no, and then I'd have to resign myself to dealing with the asshole all goddamn year and I just don't know if I work myself up to ask for this, and then I don't get it, how badly will that actually suck?
5. I. must. stop. signing. up. for. things. Run for election on state Board of Directors of Assoc of Nursing Students? Excellent! work with LGBTQ folks on my side of campus? Great! Read with kids at my kid's school twice a week for an hour? Super, thanks for asking! Work on the World AIDS week planning committee? Okay! Go to the Global Health Committee meeting because it might mean inroads with the community health folks at the SON? wellll... Meet with SON folks about gay stuff? good idea, but is this the semester for it? sigh.
6. i got a haircut today. i'm growing out the crew. shaggy surfer boy chin length here I come. in the meantime, I'm working on how to make it less fuzzy looking. the stylist said that using scissors, not clippers, will help. and smoothing serum. and i'm driving home, thinking, yeah, having it be all one color instead of salt and cinnamon might help, too. Who AM I that I wash my face twice a day, pluck my eyebrows, purchase and actually wear kitten heels, apply nailpolish, and consider dying my hair again? it's like a remix of the 80s. I thought I was done with all these femmey trappings! (also planning the breast reduction I want with my signing bonus. eep!)
7. my dishes still aren't done. yes, it's been at least 3 weeks since I updated. i still haven't washed that lasagna pan and i only recently ran out of clean gladware, so I actually will have to do it now.
   

Peds Clinical
Get this - Summer was my first clinical rotation, right? Med-surg, adult health, GI floor, lots of ostomy bags and wound vacs. Tube feedings and such. I only had a pt with a NG the last day of the rotation, and managed to fuck that up by removing the old nasty tubing to the canister and throwing it away, gettting distracted on my way to the supply closet to get new tubing and getting called back to the patient's room bc he was nauseous bc i had left him off suction too long. i still don't get NGs.
So, after that 11 weeks of patient care, I had a week of finals, three weeks off for break, and then the first half of the semester was my psych rotation, where it's simply not a good idea to touch the patients. I did vitals on the unit one morning, and I took a BP for a man who was having a hypotensive crisis (with a seated BP of 72/54 and a standing BP or 62/42, he was sent back to his room to wait for the physician - thank you for the excellent example of how to NOT provide patient-centered, competent care). No direct physiological patient care in about three months.

My first shift in peds rotation will be in the PICU. I'll be there for only one shift. I'll go in at 9a, get info on my patient. This is at a hospital where I've not worked yet, so I have the access codes for the computer, but have never used them. I'll come back at 1pm and work til 7pm with this patient and a preceptor, whom I've never met. I was thinking that this was fine, because it was just going to be observational, right? They won't let me touch really sick kids, will they?

Then I read this paragraph* in the syllabus, while looking up what to wear. It took me ten minutes to calm down and realize that I won't be in the Peds ED tomorrow, that's not for another two weeks. Then I started to freak out again when I realized that the only IV that I've ever started was on my lab partner, and the canula kept sliding out and I tried to shove it in with my finger... I'm all about the psychosocial support. I'm *very* supportive. Drawing blood? Fuck that. I gotta go.

Okay. Time for bed. I'll be up in a couple months, when it's winter break.

*Clinical Experience: The student will spend time in the Pediatric Acute Care in the Pediatric Emergency Room setting, where he/she will participate in caring for acutely ill children. Included will be nursing interventions such as triaging patients; assisting with procedures such as assessments, IV starts, blood drawing, teaching families; and providing psychosocial support to children and families.